If this is a show car, where are the import hoochies?

Porky’s Totally Awesome Weekend continued this past Sunday as we entered our first event in the , the Concours d’Elegance.  More like the Concours d’Ignorance if they let us in, am I right?  *canned laughter*

Our trusty steed looked pretty good out there, all washed up…  um.  All cleaned up, proudly displaying the “We Got Screwed” trophy from Altamont ‘08 and my lovingly handcrafted (while somewhat drunk at 1am the Friday before the show) brag board with photos of the build and racing action…

We had a good time chatting with people about the car and were pleasantly surprised to see that some people had actually heard of not only Lemons, but the Porcubimmer as well.  In fact, one of the SDGC entrants was also building a 325e for Lemons, which they had on display.  Their theme is they are taking donations to write the graffiti of your choice on the car, and in return they are turning the donations over to breast cancer research.  Now, we at Team Porcubimmer love boobies, so we had to toss them a couple bucks…

…and, uh, mark our territory, as it were.  They were good sports about it.

We also participated in some karting, since the event was held at Miramar Speed Circuit.  I’ve conveniently “lost” my timeslips.  Hmm.

For showing up at the TV studio on Sunday, Scott was invited to spin the Wheel Oh SNAP (SNAP = Several Negligibly Advantageous Prizes)…

…where we won “the Twins.”  In all SDGC competition events, the single best time from the two fastest drivers is combined for an aggregate total, regardless of whether one driver had the two best times from the event.  The Twins let you take the two fastest times at an event, regardless of whether they were set by the same person or not.  Considering Scott’s pretty much our conedodging ringer, this might actually be helpful!

We passed the SDGC equivalent of BS judging with $100 to spare, which actually kinda surprised us since the SDGC does not consider safety equipment “exempt,” since this is not a wheel to wheel series like Lemons and does not require a cage, harness, etc.  But since the car was built for Lemons, they decided to take pity on us since they realized we’re all completely insane and slightly retarded.

With BS judging complete, it was time to reveal the final Concours scores, which count towards the season point total.  They started reading the results from the bottom up…  and we were amazed when we finally heard our name called:  tied for 2nd, 7 out of 10 possible points!  I guess the “Fit and Finish” category did us in.  The kicker came when the organizers handed out some special awards…  and we won the Judges Choice trophy!

That’s right!  Best in show.  Hail to the Pricks, baby.

The first competition event is June 27 at the dragstrip at Barona.  I’m now taking bets on how fast slow we’ll run.  Come on out and cheer us on, as Scott impersonates John Force (again) and does gigantic rolling burnouts down the length of the 1/8mi!

-AJ

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